After the Apocalypse
by VioletWindStorm
Summary: Naraku is gone, but the evil will of the Shikon no Tama has not been defeated. But Evil has found a new host before Inuyasha and friends could defeat it. They have lost and must now deal with a post apocalyptic world run by mutant bunnies.


"Bunny Wars"

"After the Apocalypse"

A (very serious) Sango and Miroku Story

Inspired (of course) by both Anya and my recent dream. None of the characters are mine. They belong to Rumiko Takahashi.

The following tale takes place in a post-apocalyptic feudal Japan. Though the heroes managed to defeat Naraku long ago, they were unable to acquire the Shikon no Tama from his evil clutches, and the darkness of the Jewel sent the entire world hurdling into the apocalypse. That was when they revolted.

Sango yawned and stretched as she rolled out of bed one dark, dreary morning in the hell that was now the modern world. Of course, there was no way of telling it was morning. The large, miasmic clouds that hung in front of the sun were far too thick to allow any light through. Only certain creatures possessed eyesight acute enough to find their way around without the aid of a torch, and Sango had no desire to associate with any of those creatures. The very thought was unbearable.

Throwing an old pink kimono over her taijiya uniform and allowing her faithful companion, Kirara, out of her tiny domed habitat, she headed out into the main room. The little cat demon growled lazily, clearly displeased to have been so disturbed from her sleep. It bothered Sango to have to keep her locked up the air bubble at "night", but she could not take any chances. Ever since the earth had been plunged into the constant darkness, the demon populations had begun disappearing by the hundreds. Just where they went, nobody knew, but some supposed they were disappearing into Takahashi's most blatant plot-hole. Either way, Sango had no desire to lose the pet that also happened to be her only form of transportation to their new home.

Ever since the enemy had taken over the ground, the rebel groups had been forced to move into the floating stronghold fortresses in the sky. (Upon inquiring upon why the fortresses were able to float or who had designed them in a civilization not yet advanced enough to even know what an A-track player was, it is standard to be beaten over the head by a coconut for demanding logical physics in an anime.) The only time anyone went down to the ground now was to forage for food or to fight.

"Houshi-sama?" Sango called as she stepped into the kitchen.

"Good morning, Sango!" the monk called back from the table where he sat before a breakfast for two. "I made your favorite carrot-based quiche."

Sango grimaced. She hated carrots, but ever since the world had been taken over by mutant bunnies, the great rabbit overlords had destroyed all of the other crops. There was one advantage to the constant ingestion of carotene, however. Their eyesight had improved exponentially. (The only problem was that now everyone had a very orange tint to their skin. Had the tanning salon been invented yet, it would have been instantly put out of business.)

"Thanks," she said as she sat down across from her fiancé. After all, it was not his fault that the world had been taken over by killer bunnies bent on enslaving the human race. "So, are we going out to fight today?"

"Of course, unless…"

"Unless…?" Somehow, whenever he used that tone of voice, it sent a slimy suspicion slithering down her spine.

"Sango, has it ever occurred to you why the bunnies were able to overthrow the human population so quickly? To reduce our numbers nearly to non-existence?"

Oh no… here he went again. "Houshi-sama, what are you getting at?"

His eye became wide and innocent as though falsely accused. "Now, now Sango. Why must always accuse me of having an ulterior motive when I'm merely concerned for our people's safety?"

"Because you always do have an ulterior motive, you pervert!" How many times had they had this conversation? If someone ever wrote manga about them, it would be like a running gag. One that would get disgustingly overused in fanfiction.

"Sango," he said calmly, taking firm grasp of both her hands. "You know as well as I do that sacrifices must be made sometimes. Call me a pervert if you will, but the rabbit's rate of reproduction is definitely the key to their advantage. If you and I could just be selfless enough to equal their efforts, we could create an army of our own and drive them off the planet. Then we could reverse the apocalypse and bring back the daylight." Placing a hand lightly on her bosom, he looked her directly in the eyes and asked, "So what do you say? Shall we forgo our selfish vows of premarital chastity for the sake of humanity?"

It took all of her will power to avoid beating the living shit out of him. Whether it was her training as a taijiya that stopped her or her love for the monk, she did not know, but she was able to resist. Instead she just grinned evilly as she splattered the plate of carrot quiche into his beautiful face.

m

mmmmmm

m

"I think I see something up ahead," she shouted through her gas mask as she readied Hiraikotsu. Leaping down from Kirara's back, she sprinted forward and tried to get a better look at the large form in the distance.

"Sango!"

She did not have time to turn around and look behind her before Miroku's body collided with her at full force and sent them both tumbling to the ground. Gasping, she looked about frantically and realized what was going on. Beside them, Kirara's mane was jetting out rigidly as her vibrating body let out a feral growl. The very large thing she had seen in the distance was not actually a thing at all. It was an entire colony of red-eyed, bloodthirsty bunnies, and they were hipitty-hopping straight for them.


End file.
